All Aboard

Mission: To create a beer that tastes like someone blended up a packet of Oreo biscuits in every glass.

How to Achieve the Objective: Put loads of biscuits (minus the filling) in the mash tun when making a big old imperial stout. Then add loads of black cocoa powder at the end of the boil, add vanilla pods after fermentation, and finish with a tiny touch of natural cookies and cream food flavoring.

Hazards During Mission: The mash tun gets glued up with biscuit residue, taking hours to clean and sort out. The boil kettle gets stained black, and there’s a whole lot of mess to clean up in the fermenter.

Result: Yes, it tastes like Oreos and is thicker than a bowl of mud, with a head that resembles frog spawn when first poured (dissipates within a few seconds to a dark black oil – do not panic!).

Flavors Will Fade: Drink fresh.

Serving Suggestion: Serve at room temperature. For some reason, no one pays attention to this and keeps it in the fridge.